Amendment One

When I opened my eyes Wednesday morning of last week, I was relived to be waking up a resident of New York State. Why, you ask? Tuesday night, North Carolina passed Amendment One, an amendment that defines marriage as a union between a man and a woman. Although North Carolina was a state which already held a law banning gay marriage, Amendment One securely slams the door on the issue, going one step further in including a ban on same-sex civil unions.

However, members of the LGBT community are not the only ones who should be saddened by this decision; the “marriage-plus” amendment could potentially affect straight couples in civil union. Jeremy Kennedy, campaign manager for Protect All NC Families, a campaign against Amendment One, is concerned about the future of health benefits for domestic partners, gay or straight. There is also the fear that Amendment One could disrupt protection orders for unmarried couples, making it difficult to file for domestic abuse cases if a person is living with their significant other.

Amendment One is clearly a discriminatory act, which not only threatens the relationship status of the LGBT community, but also the security of quality health care and human rights for all. I encourage all people in favor of equal marriage laws, as well as those in favor of basic human rights, to stand up for what you believe in. There are many who hold reservations as to how long the amendment will survive, and for good reason. We are the future of the United States, and only our generation, young and informed, can stand against inexcusable amendments like Amendment One if we let our voices be heard.

Today, I am not only proud to live in a state which allows marriage equality, but am proud to be involved with an organization like Planned Parenthood. I know that if Amendment One does affect access to health care benefits for those in the LGBT community, Planned Parenthood will be there to offer quality health care for those who need it. With the help of others, especially those of my own generation, I hope to someday be proud to wake up in a place where love is not restricted or defined.

Elise
Marketing Intern, PPRSR

Image via www.hrc.org.

Georgia teen told by school officials to dress more "manly"

This is outrageous.

Learning to Embrace Your Sexuality - or - How I finally stopped listening to judgmental jerks and you should, too!

(I filled in this month for KaeLyn on the Vagina Dialogues column.. and I decided to share it here so the rest of y'all can check it out.)

I’m sure many of you are reading that title and thinking “Yeah, alright… I got there five years ago,” but I know there HAVE to be more of you (no matter what age) out there like me who just haven’t quite been able to do your own thing without letting the disapproving looks of your friends and peers burn a hole in your face.

By “do your own thing,” I assume you know I mean “have sex.” Freely. Making your own individual choices. I am talking about sex that is consensual, sex that is safe, sex that happens because you want it to, and sex that makes you feel good.

I want to make something very clear: nothing you are doing is wrong. “Wrong” is a social construction. Your sexual choices may not work for everyone, but if they make you happy and don’t threaten the safety of yourself or others, then gosh darnit please keep doing what you’re doing.

The problem is sex is still hard to talk about for many people. I grew up in a loving and accepting family, but we never talked about sex. Ever. I couldn’t say “sex” to my mom until I was 17. And don’t get me started on the lack of comprehensive sexual health education in schools, or worse, the lack of sex-positive sexual education in general.

If we can’t talk about sex then how will we ever figure it out? And if sex continues to be characterized as bad, as scary, as wrong… then where does that leave us? Stuck in a world where a group of people who think sex is the end of Western civilization try to control the dialogue. And that’s just not fair. It means that for the 95% of Americans who are having sex before marriage, there is a lack of comfort, resources, and openness for talking about sex.

So, how did I finally accept my own sexual identity and expression? I realized that I wasn’t wrong, that I make my choices for me and not the people judging me, and that thinking about and talking about sex help make sense of it. Really, it’s true. The first step was to be honest and frank with myself.

The bottom line: you’re sexuality is YOURS. Not your neighbor’s, not your brother’s, not the person sitting across from you at lunch. I may not know a whole lot in this world but I can tell you that life is far more rewarding and fulfilling when you find your own path and follow it.

So, what steps should we take when embracing our sexuality, however and with whomever we choose to experience it with?

1. Remember that the choices you make are yours. They need not apply to your best friend, your neighbor, or your parents. You have power over your individual choices.

2. Always, always, always make sure you are well stocked with safe sex materials: condoms, dental dams, finger cots, whatever. Besides that, keep some fun stuff around, too: lube, toys, whatever. And please make sure you and your partner(s) aren’t allergic to things like latex, certain lubricants, et cetera.

3. Communicate your needs and expectations, and be certain that your partner(s) is/are, also. And while you’re communicating, you might as well talk about your fantasies, too!

4. You can have erotic experiences without even having sex. And they don’t even have to be with people – they can be with the sky, the way the air smells, the way your cotton sheets feel. Get in tune with your erotic, sensual self.

5. Masturbate! Please. That way you know what you like and you will feel far more comfortable with talking about and having sex. Sex with yourself is just as legitimate and fulfilling as sex with other people.

6. Support age-appropriate, medically-accurate sex education that gives young people all the resources they need to make informed and safe decisions about sex and sexuality. You can learn more about how to support real sex ed at www.plannedparenthoodaction.org.

Get out there and enjoy your sexuality, no matter how you express it. But always remember, it’s about making choices that you feel good about.

June Declared National LGBTQ Pride Month

Sexuality and Gender are fundamental parts of who we are, because of the issue's immense importance to our society it seems obvious why President Barack Obama declared the month of June as LGBTQ Pride Month.

"NOW, THEREFORE, I, BARACK OBAMA, President of the United States of America, by virtue of the authority vested in me by the Constitution and laws of the United States, do hereby proclaim June 2009 as Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender Pride Month. I call upon the people of the United States to turn back discrimination and prejudice everywhere it exists."

The words of Barack Obama resonate with people all around the world who find hope and inspiration from LGBTQ progression throughout history.

"Forty years ago, patrons and supporters of the Stonewall Inn in New York City resisted police harassment that had become all too common for members of the lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender (LGBT) community. Out of this resistance, the LGBT rights movement in America was born. During LGBT Pride Month, we commemorate the events of June 1969 and commit to achieving equal justice under law for LGBT Americans," recalls the President.

Each of us has a gender and gender identity. Our gender identity is our deepest feelings about our gender. We express our gender identity in the way that we act masculine, feminine, neither, or both. Some of us are transgender — which means that our biological sex and our gender identity do not match up. Each of us also has a sexual orientation. You may be bisexual, gay, lesbian or straight. Or you may be “questioning” — unsure about your sexual orientation.

It is important to note that no matter what you identify with President Obama plans to ensure your safety and comfort, "The LGBT rights movement has achieved great progress, but there is more work to be done. LGBT youth should feel safe to learn without the fear of harassment, and LGBT families and seniors should be allowed to live their lives with dignity and respect" proclaims Obama.

The more you understand biological sex, gender, gender identity, and sexual orientation, the more you may understand yourself and how you relate to other people. Because sex and gender are so complex, you may have many questions. You may wonder about your own sexual orientation or gender identity, or you may wonder about someone you know. You may have questions about how society views sex and gender — including homophobia, sexism, and transphobia. Remember that staff at your local Planned Parenthood Health Center can talk with you and help you find the information and resources that you need.